Tag Archives: life

Seattle in a truck 


I arrived in Seattle less than two weeks ago and thus far I have a job, friends, and a car to sleep in. The job I got on my second day in town, my best friend is the first person I met in town, and the car in my friends car. The car is a lifted truck by which I have made a bedding in the bed and sleep fine. I don’t have any forms of identification and going from a non-identified person to an identified person is not easy to do in the US and aside from all the tedious amount of running around to different government buildings, I am doing fairly fucking awesome. I know almost nothing about this city which makes a large part of my experience completely novel and so I am like a baby that has learned how to use the bus system. It’s kinda fucking great.

The first thing I did after getting off the bus in Seattle was to head down to the pedicab garage to get a job. I have worked pedicabs all across the country and know how easy it can be to get a job. In most cities there is a licensing process and maybe a letter of hire, but here in Seattle it was a process of getting on a bike and going out to make money. All anyone would have to do would be to find the manager and you got yourself a job. The first weekend of working cabs we worked a Huskies football game. There was quite a bit of bitching about how cabbers did not make enough money but we all bought beer and got drunk that night. I was tired but happy that night.

Downtown Seattle you can find me on the waterfront most of the time. There are only a few bars that card regularly and without i.d. I am unable to join the mainstream of people that frequent the weekend barseen but I still frequently go out for drinks and explore the old brick buildings that remind me of St. Paul. Got punched in the head the other night in a mosh pit at a punk rock show. It was awesome. Dude Juicy Karkass rocked all of our worlds. Other than that it’s been city car adventures and hanging out with the dudes.

In the evening there is a regular crowd of dudes drinking beer outside the pedicab garage. We are talking about 5-10 pedicabbers who are in their mid thirties and just like talking. Most of them live out of a truck or van and I found myself at home on the first night. We trade a lot of stories and it’s fun to hang out with them and get drunk but no chicks gets old quick and so I am working on branching out and doing my own thing a lot of the time.

Apparently Seattle has one of the largest populations of people that live out of their vehicles. This is exactly what I am looking to do. I found a great deal on a Subaru Outback and will buy it as soon as I have enough money. The weird part about having enough money is that I do have enough money but the bank won’t let me access all of it without i.d. so at the moment I am withdrawing 300 a day until I have enough. It should be by the end of the week.

Back to the beginning; moments after getting into Seattle I met a guy that is working on a bus. After a bit of chit chat through a window he invites me up and shows me his projected home. This guy buys busses and then lives on then while he does the seats, tile flooring, cedar ceiling, a kitchen, bathroom, the works. After he finishes the bus he lives and tours out of it until he finds a buyer. This is the guy that is turning into my best friend here in Seattle and constantly he is making me want to buy my own bus. It’s a tricky situation at this point for the reason of me not really know what I want to do with my life…

We all could feel the first day of fall two days ago. Most of the cabbers are not fond of Seattle winters and the back of the truck is getting cold at night which makes me wonder what I will want to do for this coming winter. I have two options in mind that I will lay out before you. I want to hear what y’all think.

1. Live in Seattle for a few months then sell the Subaru and dip out to Australia like I had originally planned. Australian adventure!

2. Stay in the states. Buy a bus. Prepare for pedicabbing the festival season this coming season. Build a bus, build a cab, start stocking up on the deemsters, get connected with the pedicabbers in charge of the festivals.

Life is great. We can manifest anything we choose. It takes work but with goals so grand can’t really do anything but be compelled into action. Almost like something greater has taken control of our bodies and, like puppets we guided to sacred places. 

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5 reasons to learn lucid dreaming today!

Do you do yoga? Meditate? Read books and strive to eat a balanced diet? Well then why the fuck are you not lucid dreaming? In my opinion it’s just as important as all of the mentioned above and here is why. 

1. To create any fantasy you can imagine.Imagination is like a muscle. The more you use it the better it gets. Now let’s imagine all the things that we have yet to imagine. Hard to imagine huh? Well before we get too meta maybe we should look at the things that we can think about. There are a lot of things to be thought. A lot of universes to be created. All of which can be done in the lucid dream. It’s like having your own Oculus rift only waaay the fuck better. Have you ever wanted to fly? Hang out with dinosaurs? Bang it out with 50 of the hottest creatures anyone has ever seen? Sit in solitude on the dark side of the moon? All of this can be done by exercising the lucid dreaming muscle and its not as hard as you might think.

2. To travel to different dimensions.

Ok now is the time to get meta. There is more to the lucid dream than just the imagination. Just imagine, there are parts of your brain that you have yet to unlock. Flying through space is easy enough but ripping the space/time fabric apart and sendin it hard into the space between space; talk about a trip. Actually you can’t really talk about it. I mean, people try all the time but one of the common things that people express about these states of being is that it’s so hard to describe. It must be lived. The fact that humans are capable of mystical experience is baffling. To know that you have some of the most profound experiences of your life through a practice is some of the greatest part of being human. 

3. To talk to sides of yourself that you didn’t know where there.

A necessary requirement to lucid dreaming is that the dreamer becomes aware. Something in the mind exclaims “What presents itself before me is but a dream!”. By becoming aware of yourself you are able to become the unattached observer and thus gain great control over all aspects of life. In Robert Waggoner’s book “Lucid Dreaming: Gateway to the Inner Self” he refers to a state of consciousness within the dream in which the dreamer becomes aware of a separate consciousness with the dream. “I have come to think of it as a true self; an awareness hidden by layers of misguided core beliefs developed in childhood. What questions would you ask if you possessed such profound lucid wisdom?”

4. To practice and improve real life skills.

Why do we dream? What practical reason could there be for inventing landscapes in the mind? Could the ones who dream have an evolutionary advantage over those who do not? Who can say? There are many theories from the Freudian of subconscious sexual impulses manifesting themselves in imagery, to totally random firings of the brain, or that the dream help with memory formation. Some say that the dream is practice for life. The brain is able to problem solve and thus able to use what it learns and apply it to the real world. Dream training grounds…

5. To give greater meaning to life.

In my opinion the reason for life is meaning. It’s what drives all action and compels moral ideals that are greater than any individual can hope to be. Through dreams we can achieve something greater than ourselves and exist in a world beyond. There are different rules in the dream. Different rules to test our notions of what is real. Some rules are the same however and by testing against these boundaries can we gain a deeper sense of reality and thus have greater meaning. 

There is so much that I have not touch about the dream. Just think; reuniting with the deceased, conquering your fears in a safe(?) envornment, processing complex emotions that allow for the next jump in consciousness. This is really the tool for massive self improvement and has to potential to bring expounding benefit to the core of life so that we may sit back and watch the abundance spread like fire throughout the soul. So if I am able to purswade anyone of anything let it be this: right before you fall asleep tonight tell yourself “tonight I will lucid dream”.

The responsibility behind the words “trust me”

the-beatles

One of my admirers once told me “please don’t fuck up my life.”

The request took me aback, but I smiled with the realization of where we stood in relation to each other. He was younger that I but not more confused than I had been at his age. He looked to me to give order to his life and to put him down a path of confidence, and it was my responsibility to change his perspective to teach him to look into himself to answer questions of uncertainty.

Without a smile I gripped his shoulder, leaned forward and looked deep into his eyes telling him “Trust me. I’m not going to fuck up your life. In fact, if you’re open to it this could be the best thing that ever happened to you.”

With that touch, the eye contact, and those words, his face softened just a bit. There was still fear in his eyes by which the elimination of was our unspoken agreement.

And with that he began to tell me that he keep a very high standard of himself. I told him to start keeping a higher standard of himself.

Any degression into fear or uncertainty is a mistake and it is the responsibility of the mentor to cut these thing out at the root. To foresee them before they manifest in any way. Trust is confidence. If you trick people into believing in a false sense of confidence you are leading them off a cliff and fuck you.

Much love.

Reconnecting with nature

I have wondered why people find it so interesting to go to scenic places in nature. The connection to the earth doesn’t seem to get to me in the way that others have explained it and the prestige that comes with the pictures doesn’t make sense in and of itself. The only way to give meaning to finding scenic views is the exercise to get there and the possibly the people that join you on the journey. The group can have a quasi meaningful mission that can work as a bonding experience and productive and this gives meaning over something that is meaningless in and of itself. 

Perhaps people, and a deep level understand that these places will not be around for much longer. What we are actually doing is saying our last words to a dying friend and that this is what it really means to connect with nature. To stand in realization to the impermanence of beauty and almost mournfully watch the moments destroy themselves for the creating of the new. 

The past is beautiful and it is something to be missed. No one knows what the future will bring but we can say that it will look different than now. For better or worse it doesn’t really matter. All we are is a striving for a more complete perspective. 

It’s a search for happiness. 

“Imagination is the human compacity to look into the all of the possible futures, pick the best future and pull it to meet the present moment.”

It’s a search for happiness and a quest for freedom. To reach reach above the clouds and unfurls ones wings in a desperate display of power and wisdom. With the sun shining on ones back we have the right to be the gods of which we were born as. Leting the universe unfold and the beauty of life touch the deepest and most protected places of our hearts. We are exactly as we were meant to be. 

There are those that creep. Under the rays of the sun do they squirm. Writhing from within the gut calling for a changing of the spine. Through art and deception. Through bliss and ignorance. Do not let down your guard for this lends is not to be looked through. 

Strait up. No one is invincible and there are things in this world that can forever taint the soul.

“One must be an ocian before one can even thing about taking on a polluted stream.”

Keep to the higher path and let no one take you down. They will say you have a high horse but off your horse only weakness can be found. Let yourself be taken. By spirits that are strange. Let’s yourself be carried away by the people that play a different game. Always be aware. Of forces that devoure. For there are people out there. That prey for your weakest hour. Sweetness is a touch that will never turn to rotten. Live a life of love and never be forgotten.

Sales

Life on Maui has been one of the most wonderful experiences that I have ever had in my life. Woohoohoo I feel blessed. The guys that I work with are of a different sort than I am used to and the process of becoming a member of the team was extremely stressful. Before living with a sales team I was living in New Orleans and hanging out on the street. Its a different mindset. On the streets of New Orleans you will find the most interesting and diverse group of people in the USA if not the world. For a group like that to come together and be peaceful (for the most part) it requires everyone to have an open and accepting mindset. Here on Maui I am teamed with a group who views themselves as an elite class with elite skills and in many ways they are. The team on Maui is highly educated and comes from wealthy families who are well connected. After being accepted by elite class of people I can finally feel secure and now question if this is the place that I would like to be.

New Orleans, though beautiful and desperately alive, was desperately fragile. There was something forever savage and primitive there, something that threatened the exotic and sophisticated life both from within and without. Every stone in the streets and every brick of the french houses had been bought from the fierce wilderness that forever surrounded the city, ready to engulf it. Hurricanes, floods, fevers, disease, and the damp of the Louisiana climate itself worked tirelessly on every hewn plank or stone facade, so that New Orleans seemed at all times like a dream held intact by her striving, unconscious population.

The island of Maui had been forcefully taken from its native people who even after 100 years still harbored a vengeful unaccepting nature to the haole (white foreigner) that seems as an impassable barrier barring me from the true nature of the island. There is a different type of person who chooses to venture to the most beautiful and remote places on earth. While I would not refer to these other people as the beautiful people I will say that there is much to learn from their arrogance. An arrogance that can only be gained through great achievement in life and therefor at least grounded in a skill of some sort. Only in Maui have I been able to blend with this arrogant type of person which has given me a strange sense of satisfaction. My soul however, does not feel the same.

There are many options ahead of me and the unknown is of great importance.