I write this post from my couch where I do not have the unstoppable attitude. Like most, I am afraid letting my worst judgement get the best of me. Unlike most I have a drive for truth that I may ride from these depths I have fallen into, all the way to whatever bastion of sunlight I desire. From here I make a stand to change and escape the fear common amongst sheep. Ride with me if you want and we can explore the depth of the indolent.
I’m talking about the whip and the ability to tell yourself no. No do not eat that cupcake cupcake, no do not play video games when you know that you should be outside making friends and playing in the sun. The real surprising thing is that I am not naturally drawn to these types of activities. Like most, I am drawn to junk food and television and must put in effort to bring myself to the activities the produce natural good feels. I often ask myself why do I prefer boring darkness when there is such excitement in the world. Only in the dreary do I let the world pass by.
What I mean by better judgment would be the moralistic character or the affinity to do good. Whatever good may be is another thing altogether. The ability to do good is something knowable at any given moment. At times close decisions involving cataclysmic moments in life can make determining the good challenging at times but what I would like to focus on is the ability to do good with all of the small things in life. Eating is the best example that I can think of because what is good to eat is generally staring us in the face and hardly ever gets accomplished perfectly on a long term scale.
All writing above this line has been to achieve something different than the status quo. If I take an honest look at my life I find that I am fairly satisfied. I have had and seized the opportunity for adventure on most turns and now find myself in a world of possibility. Most of what I am upset about is that these things don’t come easy to me, but I could just as easily accept the challenges in life and begin to love the struggle.
In the self-improvement section of any bookstore you will find two types of books. Books that will offer information on how to improve in life, and books on how to accept any shortcomings we might have. While both are important to living a fulfilling life, I have always sided with improving rather than accepting, and so fully self aware I cast myself back into a agonizing pit of striving for self-fulfillment. Sometimes it’s easy, other times I can’t get myself to get out of bed. Here in this blog is where I pour myself and my misery hoping that through writing and self-expression that I might find the keys to this universal mystery.
Must we first come up with a question before we can begin to look for answers or might solutions spontaneously appear even when direction is lost. I can truthfully say that I feel good now, almost bulletproof even. Hoping that I may evade all traps and pitfalls, I still sit here and wait my next down-going.
For the strength to persevere through hard times, to cultivate discipline to direct action towards any goal, growing the courage to set higher goals, wielding wisdom to avoid traps and pitfall, and my the thirst that has yet to be quenched grow deeper and unsatiated everyday. This is an unstoppable attitude. This is something to embody and live each and everyday.